Embrace Your Inner Degenerate

Pitt, Damon, Carrottop?

We begin this episode with a warning, all stripper and hooker talk is kept to an abolute minimum. If you would like to skip this show, we understand.

But don’t worry, there’s still plenty of depravity to go around including boob jobs, male pampering, more TD celebrity encounters, and a change to the show that may change things forever! But probably won’t.

Finally, you’ll here the boy’s opinions on douchbags in hats, high heeled shoes, and orthodontics, a selection of Vegas events from classical guitar to “Did you ever notice…”, and 12 guys who may be vomiting their way around 18 holes.

Email: Brian Mollica brian@notiowa.com and Tommy Dutch tom@notiowa.com Give us a call 206-203-Iowa


42 Responses to Pitt, Damon, Carrottop?

  1. patch406 says:

    I’ve got a confession and an interesting observation after listening to this am’s episode. First of all, I did attend the John Mayer concert in Vancouver, WA last weekend. I’m by NO MEANS a fan. My wife and moms both love him something fierce. My folks drove all the way from Montana and my wife was super into it, so I was a good husband and son and went along grudingly. I do admire his guitar skills, but that’s about it. Nevertheless, he did try and pulls a few funnies between songs including the following in which he address the “girls in the audience”. He said if your sitting next a guy and he’s wearing a hat…make sure that hat is on forward and COMPLETELY straight. He went on to observe that whatever percentage off from perfect midline…that’s what percent DICK the guy is. Take a look at the hat and do the math. HIGHlarious. Coincidentially, today BMO: A. disses John Mayer (which is reasonable, but he’s a pretty easy target) and B. makes observations about guys with hats pointed towards 1 o’clock. Interesting, eh?

  2. yzerman13 says:

    OK … OK … OK,

    A few things that i noticed this week. First off, i just don’t get the whole palms thing. I could fit the entire casino in my house and there are a ton of hot girls all around vegas. i like to be around people who aren’t all 21.

    I’m starting to think that Tommy is gay. Who would want a girl with a great set of tits. I want her to be natural, this way he can rub he knees and her nips at the same time. Sounds great, where do i sign for that deal.

    Next, the art of shaving isn’t even close to be the gilmore girls or avril levine. Men go the art of shaving all the time, no one with a penis has ever watched the gilmore girls with the promise of sex.i can’t even comment on avril levine.

    Finally the bet, I would say that you guys should play, but i can’t even think of what we would need to do the tommy that would be equal to what were are doing. Maybe makeout with a guy in public???

    Great job again this week, Let me know if you guys are coming out for a beer next week.


  3. e_karros says:

    One thing you guys missed in the Luxor review: the spa there is allegedly a pretty popular place for gay men to meet for sex. But then, so is tommy’s apartment.

  4. Jeff says:

    Holy crap. I was looking to start up a Dis Tommy column on my own Website and call in with all the highlights to your show. But this is insane. Why you all gotta be T-Dutch Hatahs!!??

    Tommy. In light of your exit from the closet, I’m starting up a new blog…it’s called followtommy.com. I’ve got the domain name already and now I just need you to wear a camera on your head all the time just like Justin.tv so we can see what you’re really about.

    AND FINALLY, I would have called this in but I was WAY TOO embarrassed, I did NOT ever hear that Dutch wasn’t your real name. That truly was a guess. I only started listening to the show when Brian left the OTHER network…so I’m a newbie.

    Keep up the good work, man. And by man I mean Brian.

    xxxx oooo Tommy.


    Bowl of Cheese

  5. patch406 says:


  6. brian says:

    Damn, 4 posts in and Tommy’s sexuality has been questioned twice! Normally I rejoice in the misfortune of others, but patch’s info that John Mayer and I are some kind of kindred spirits has left me contemplating what method of suicide to go with.

  7. patch406 says:

    It’s a coinflip I’d say go with either cyanide or take the Nestea Plunge off the Stratsophere.

  8. yzerman13 says:

    And stupid me, I was thinking that dutch was going to be telling stories of loose women and late night drinking. I’m married with 1 child and 1 about 8 weeks away. I think that my life is more exciting. 🙂

    Come on tommy, lets take this to the next level, fake tits and loose women. That should be the name of mondays show. I wanna hear that tommy banged 3 whores and the all have fake tits, pay for it or not, thats up to you.


  9. Dutch says:

    I’m on TAI’s favorite team the Oakland A’s tonight. Of course I’m taking the RL in what should be a low scoring game. Fits the Philosphy well but I tend to be snakebitten when A.L. teams are involved, so we shall see.
    Pick is Oakland RL -185 at Palms
    Season total: +149

    In regards to my sexual orientation, I’ve campaigned for gay rights and have many gay friends so being questioned is a bit like someone saying I’m Italian or African American.

    By the way, not really an Avril fan just enjoy hearing her the five times a day I hear her being played everywhere in society. I can’t wait til one you guys watches the Gilmore Girls. The show is brilliantly written. If you like His Girl Friday you should like it.

    More on this Wednesday + an all time classic from our boy Mofobes.

  10. brian says:

    Believe me, Dutch downplays his sexcapades. Maybe they don’t seem like a big deal to him anymore. If you don’t believe wait until you hear about his weekend on the Monday show. Here’s a preview, he wakes up with a glittery napkin in his pocket that has a phone number and the name “Princess”. Man I hate him sometimes.

    PS – If Tommy’s girlfriend is reading this, I made the whole thing up.

  11. asterion says:

    Man, it’s Friday night and I’m watching National Bingo Night. And to make it worse, I’m actually playing along. I have got to get a life. And no, I am not going to the bingo hall in town.

    You watching, Brian?

  12. Dutch says:

    I think Princess slipping in that number and all the love we were getting last night had a lot more to do with the green Mofobes was throwing around. It looks like we’re going to have him on Monday to discuss poker and the World Series. It could be difficult to stick to sports and poker during our Monday show.

  13. brian says:

    Sorry asterion. You’re on your own there. Ever since I was overlooked as the obvious perfect host, I’ve vowed to boycott NBN.

  14. mofobes says:

    yeah, how does that work. i lay out the cash and tommy gets the number. that is F’ed up.

    i can’t wait to hear the stories about thursday/friday since i don’t seem to remember much about the evening.

    good job with the A’s tommy. what a crazy game that was. pedro feliz fills in as catcher, randy winn goes to third and noah lowry plays right field. it would be a disgrace if we couldn’t win after those moves.

  15. KGB says:

    I know those guys at the Wynn are playing for some huge jack – with a 1.1M overlay it seems like +EV – but what about golf in Iowa this week:



  16. patch406 says:

    This is TOTAL bullshit.

    I’m enroute to Vegas tomorrow with ONE GOAL:

    To pay for some Agassi Endorsed Cheerleading Cooter.

    Now that dream is squashed.

    Trip’s off fellas.


  17. patch406 says:

    My “zing” post was to follow post #3. Somehow post number #4 slipped past the goalie a day later. I do not feel that this post is worthy of the “Zing” title.

  18. patch406 says:

    I wanted to address Tommy’s insinuating that I was going to “take a dive” in the upcoming humilation bet. This seemed to have a little truth comes out when you’re joking flavor to it. I’d like to go on record stating that I feel that watching a season of the Gilmore Girls would be excrutiating. Also, I’m a music guy. I own several thousand albums….zero of them are Avril Lavigne. I suggested this bet because I wanted to promote some TAI camaraderie not because I secretly want an excuse to experience these “art forms”.

    That said, I clearly know that Mofobes is the favorite. However, this ain’t my first rodeo either. I’ve played in the last 2 WSOP and the last year’s Bellagio Cup. I’ve got some experience and skills in playing poker. If you think I’ll “crack” under the pressure of playing cards, you simply don’t understand what I deal with on a daily basis.

    I’ve created some odds on the bet. Mofobes will be the clear favorite as suggested by Tommy D. I’m going to make Yzerman the underdog ONLY because he hasn’t had as much time to consider the punishment AND he has a child on the way. He’s clearly got much more important decisions to deal with that whether or not to raise from the cutoff with queen/nine of diamonds. This way when Yzerman wins his payout will be huge enough to finance a private education for his unborn baby. I’ve got the edge on Stevie Y because I’ve printed several of Mofobes posts and hung them all over my bedroom mirror into which I stare concentrating on how badly I want to win while blasting “eye of the tiger”. I’ve been doing this for an hour/day for weeks now.

    Mofobes 3-1
    Patch 5-1
    Yzerman 7-1

    Judge Smails: You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he’s been club champion for three years running and I’m no slouch myself.
    Ty Webb: Don’t sell yourself short Judge, you’re a tremendous slouch.

  19. chris duhon's nemesis says:

    Dutch –

    I’m sure that no one actually gives a shit but the club at Luxor used to be called RA not KA (th cirque show at MGM). The new club is called LAX.


  20. e_karros says:

    Sounds like CDN’s been to the spa, too.

  21. Dutch says:

    Good call Duhon, I’ve made that mistake before

    Patch, only intended as a “joking flavor to it”, I also own a lot of music and nothing by Avril. Agassi cheerleading coach has “This Ain’t Iowa” segment written all over it

  22. JR says:

    Hey CDN Thanks for the info on LAX, Yotime Joe got a great deal for us this Nov at Luxor for $685 for 8 nights All the better to save for drinking money! Also i checked out the Luxor site and they dont seem to be promoting the club, is it new? or is it that shitty they dont mention it?

    Dutch, looking forward to the segment on the Cheerleading coach, i didn’t think it would be long before hookers got back in the show. Just to let you know my girlfriend has been casually listening to the show on weekends (you must have more than 2 females listeners now?) and made me click on the link for A-Rods mistress that Paigow Pete put up, looks like TAI has corrupted another!

  23. Scott J. says:


    8 nights is Vegas? You’re a better man than I!

  24. brian says:

    Good Call JR. That fantastic deal for 8 nights would average out to around $32,000 when it’s all said and done. And it’s sounds like your girl is a keeper, not only can she tolerate our bullshit, she’s in to checking out naked strippers too.

  25. Steve in West Palm says:

    Tommy Dutch: I know that you’re way left on the political dial, but were you aware that Ronald Reagan’s nickname was also “Dutch”? I assume this had considerable bearing on your adoption of this fictitious nomiker.

    This will be the extent of my “political” comments on the TAI message board, as the thought of “President Hillary” banging interns in the oval office in ’09… makes me cringe.

  26. KGB says:

    While thinking about Brian and John Mayer being kindred spirits, I ran across this article in the May 6 LV Sun:


    Only a month after the big 1 April show too…any more news on this poor bastard?

  27. JR says:

    Hey Scott J,

    when you have to endure a 13 hour flight to LA and a short one again to Vegas you have to make the most of it, besides Yotime Joe wont go with me for anything less than a week! I’ll have to go into detox and refinance the house when i get back!

    Brian – The GF is definitely a keeper, wasn’t sure how she would take the show but now she is giggling away to it each weekend. Cant wait for the 3 shows a week format, should be a cracker Monday!

  28. mofobes says:

    LAX is supposed to open sometime after the 4th of July.

  29. brian says:

    That was freaky KGB. We mentioned it on the show when it happened, but we were nervous to spend too much time on it. I’m still not conviced there were no TAI ties.

  30. brian says:

    Time for an non sports related prediction on tonight’s Sopranos Series finale. I’m putting my money on Paulie Walnuts switching sides and bumping off Tony.

  31. Trainfan John says:

    and now Brian – back to sports.

  32. YoTime Joe says:

    Well I’m on a roll. 1st the casino I like to drink at comes in at 25 then where I have booked to stay next time comes in at 22. Mandalay must be next with Wynn not far in front.

  33. YoTime Joe says:


  34. KGB says:

    Brian – You mentioned the real guy taking a header off the Strat on the show? Don’t know how I missed it. Traffic must have been bad that morning and I was busy showing a little KGB-justice to the frat boy in the next lane.

  35. dipperfc says:


  36. mofobes says:

    that was a wonderful sweep of the giants w/ 2 shut outs. NICE!

  37. Lady Grey says:

    I am here weeks too late to defend Tommy and Myself for that matter. First I think it is great that Tommy loves real boobs and at the same time I think it is great that Brian love fake ones. It just proves one of the greatest things in this world, there is something for everyone, and just becuase this person doesn’t love what you have to offer it is ok because someone else will. As far as how this is defending me, well yzerman13 said something about Tommy being gay becuase he like the real breat then made a comment about how that would mean that he can run his knees and her npis at the sametime, and as someone with real boobs, I would like to say that they only way someone can rub his knee and my nip at the sametime is if I were to put my boob on his leg….and mine are far from small. SO I think that an important point that was missed in all this is that a girl can have real and yet amazing boobs at all the same time, and I for one think that Tommy is looking for the best of both worlds, the girl that is a natural and firm DDD, look in Sep 07 playboy to see what I mean.

  38. brian says:

    Great speech Lady Grey. You certainly have my vote in ’08. Unfortunately at the rate you’re running, you won’t show up until 2010.

  39. Lady Grey says:

    Hey I am not all that far behind these days….and at least you all know that I love you enough that I still listen in on the old stuff. And how can you be mad at a girl for being to busy becuase she was trying to keep up her GPA so she can get into law school….

    But more importantly, did you see the Sep 07 center fold? She is from Vegas.

  40. slashdogx says:

    How do you know her Lady Grey?

  41. Lady Grey says:

    Can’t say that I know her, I just happen to have a subscription to Playboy, and I did take the time to read about her before I looked at all the pics.

    In my sad attempt to defend Tommy’s sexuality I have certinaly done mine no good at all…lol, oh well what can you do?

  42. slashdogx says:

    Its all good. Hope you make it back to the future soon. Do it on your own timing. Good luck on your quest for law school.

Leave a reply